Gloves are off
I found out, via an offhand remark made by a second cousin in a Facebook message, that my grandmother died two months ago.
Two months ago.
Two fucking months ago.
Yes, we’re estranged. But one of them couldn’t pick up the damn phone, or send an email, or something?
All the careful beating around the bush I’ve done to avoid airing my family’s crazy-ass dirty laundry – yeah, I’m done.
Screw that. That little veneer of civility that kept me from sharing the worst of the worst? It’s gone. I feel really fucking uncivilized right now. Mom who went batshit crazy when I was a teenager, physically abused me (and doubtless my other sibs) and flirted with my (gay) male friends? Check. Dad who wears tights and pretends he’s a founding father — and is married to a psycho woman with 17 cats? Check. Brother-in-law showing up with a random STD but oh, no, he didn’t cheat? Check. Brother marrying crazy-ass European chick? Check. Other brother with weapons fetish? Yep.
Whatevs, fam. We’re through. Maybe I’ll finally do what the shrinks have been after me to do and write all this crap down. It could be, you know, cathartic.
12 Responses to “Gloves are off”
Ugh – so sorry to hear that. I am not particularly close to my father’s family, though I wouldn’t necessarily say estranged, but when his mom died, they called and told us when the funeral was etc.
I’m so sorry.
What is wrong with family these days?!? Ugh. I feel like I could just slap some of them…. Not telling you just isn’t fair and uncalled for! Nothing like people acting like they are 5 year olds! Blah! **hugs**to you girl.
I’m sorry to hear about your grandmother passing. And sorry you were the last one to know. I think it’s great you write it all down and get it out. Plus I love to hear about crazy relatives!
So sorry to hear about that. It seems like someone should have informed you and it’s just rude on their part. And while I understand you not wanting to air your dirty laundry, since you are a writer I think it really would be therapeutic for you, whether or not you share it.
I’m sorry about your grandmother. Family sucks. I have a similar story with my grandmother (Dad’s). What’s worse is that, as fucked up as my family is, I know your family is way more fucked up than mine. So write the book. It can’t fix the problem, but it might make you feel better.
Again, I’m sorry for your loss, and if I lived even remotely close by, I’d come over with hugs and chocolate.
Why is it good people try so hard to treat jerks the way they’d want to be treated? Jerks are not good people. It’s the glitch in the golden rule, if you ask me.
There comes a time when a person hurts you so much that you become immune to it, like my husband with his bees. He got stung so much that he doesn’t even notice it anymore. Getting to that point means you have to go through a lot of stinging, but I’m happy you’re there. You have better things to do than waste your talent on evil idiots.
My husband’s a beekeeper, by the way. Not too different from you – although you don’t keep bees as much as grow up in a hive full of nasty ones.
I’m sorry about your grandmother… and the rest of it too.
Oh wow. First, that is horrible. I found out my cousin had testicular cancer from a FB post by my uncle. I empathize how horrible it is to receive such news that way. As for the rest, I can just imagine how hurtful it must be.
EH, I am so sorry.
So sorry for your loss. Also, it is really painful when family lets us down, even in the most basic things. I know it would’ve been awkward, but seriously: they should have made the call.
Maybe they are scared of you. Not that that is your fault, that’s just all I can think of.
WTF? What kind of assholes wouldn’t have told you she died?
I’m sorry for your loss, but even more sorry you have to share DNA with such thoughtless people. Take it from me and my own group of dysfunctional assholes, DNA does not a family make. It just makes it a group of people more likely to be a match if you ever need a kidney. Who would probably be too selfish to give you one.
Put it in a book and make it a bestseller. Then at least something good will have come from knowing those people.