The Facebook status I’d never post
Posted on December 19th, 2011
My Facebook friends are having lovely holidays for the most part, and I am enjoying their holidays vicariously. Which is why I won’t ever post this:
- More blood drawn today. No results until (I’m told, best case) Friday. TB is being pitched as an upbeat diagnosis.
- So, yeah. TB. Go, me!
- To pay for Pea’s school, we are dependent on getting reimbursed from FSA childcare funds. We can’t submit for reimbursement until after the first of the month. We haven’t been reimbursed yet, and so we haven’t paid for December’s tuition. You may have noticed that it’s the 19th; I have. And so has the school, who now wants to assess a $5/day late fee. FSA, not so much.
- So, yeah. Screw you, FSA. Thanks.
- That was the email I opened immediately after getting back from the doctor today. After spending most of Saturday wallowing in self-pity, I was doing pretty well yesterday, until the doctor’s visit this morning.
- In a few minutes, a friend is supposed to drop by a present for Pea (which is wonderful and sweet) but I can’t stop crying.
- My therapy appointment is Wednesday and I can’t afford it.
- Holiday spirit? I have none.
I am trying to feel grateful for the blessings in my life, but you know, that only takes you so far when you want to curl up in a fetal position.
The reality is this is temporary (well, except for the TB, which would hopefully also be temporary); this is a VERY hard month financially for a perfect storm of circumstances that I haven’t bored you all with (other than the associated co-pays for all these damn medical visits).
Once a doctor M was working for said something to him along the lines of, “Oh, it’s just money, M.” This became our “let them eat cake” line, and the other day, he did a pitch-perfect imitation of the doctor and I laughed. I think if I saw her today I’d throttle her.
UPDATE: Tea with a friend helped. A lot. I still can’t talk about the medical bit without becoming a wreck, but that’s as it is.